There’s Something Worse Than Lawyers

I confess that’s a somewhat misleading title because there are lots of things worse than lawyers. But, in addition to cold sores, computer breakdowns and a flare-up of my rheumatoid arthritis, they tend to be actual criminals.

The folks I have in mind are the academics, those escapees from college campuses who tend to congregate around Barack Obama. It’s almost as if Obama has made a pledge, vowing never to allow a person who has been actively engaged in, say, commerce into his inner circle.

It’s not that academic types are terrible people, it’s that they have little or no life experience that enables them to base their opinions on anything other than theory. And the trouble with theories is that they are unproven.

The result of Obama’s latest campus trolling is Samantha Power, who taught at Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government, and is now the person he has selected to replace serial liar Susan Rice as our ambassador to the U.N.

While her champions like to point out that Ms. Power served on Obama’s high-sounding Atrocity Prevention Board as its first director, it’s an inconvenient truth that the Board remained strangely silent while thousands of civilians were slaughtered in Syria and the Sudanese government massacred countless Nuba tribal members in South Sudan.

What Ms. Power’s fans are reluctant to mention is that she recommended that the U.S. should invade Israel militarily in order to bring about a settlement to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and protect a new state of Palestine.

To be fair, in 2008, Powers did call Hillary Clinton a monster. So she’s not all bad.

Still, as a matter of policy, I would prevent anyone who has ever been a member of a college faculty from holding a position in government. I would also exclude anyone who has ever attended an Ivy League school. Nothing good, after all, can ever come of feeding the egos of the terminally egotistical. It’s not ivory towers we need to worry about so much as ivy-covered towers.

When I attended UCLA, I had a classmate who went on to get his graduate degree at Brown and then wound up at the University of Michigan, where he spent the next several decades teaching and writing the sort of fatuous poetry filled with references to old Greek deities. Starting at the age of six, he was rarely far removed from one school or another, except for vacations, until it came time to retire. As a result, he thought and spoke exactly as he had as a pretentious, but empty-headed, teenager. Perhaps if you’re teaching poetry to undergrads, none of that really matters. It does, however, when it comes to having a say in determining national policy.

Speaking of which, until Federal Judge Michael Baylson over-ruled her, Secretary of Health and Human Resources Kathleen Sebelius was going to deprive 10-year-old Sarah Murnaghan of her shot at ever making it to 11. The only good thing to be said for Sebelius is that she gave us a pretty clear picture of what life under ObamaCare will be like.

When mushy-headed people insist that crime and violence have everything to do with poverty, nothing to do with race, you have to wonder how they explain that blacks committed 80% of the shootings in New York City last year, with 18% committed by Hispanics. Are there no poor white people in New York? Isn’t it just possible that violence has more to do with illegitimacy rates; an absence of discipline in homes without a father’s presence; and a lack of not only education, but religious values, than with money?

I have a lot more questions awaiting answers. For instance, inasmuch as the IRS started targeting conservative groups in 2011, I have to suspect those groups complained to their Republican senators and congressmen. So why is it that until recently the rest of us never heard about those dirty tricks? Why weren’t Marco Rubio, Rand Paul, John McCain, and all those other folks who have bully pulpits and love to hear the sound of their own voices, screaming their heads off about it?

Next, does Bill O’Reilly have to pay the going rate for commercial time on Fox to endlessly peddle his books, caps and coffee mugs? If not, why not?

Finally, why is it that liberals are never called fascists in public? After all, Harry Belafonte told Al Sharpton over at MSNBC that Obama should throw all of his political opponents in jail. He went on to describe Republicans as “an infestation,” a mighty big word for the “Banana Boat” man.

Bette Midler, upon learning that the Internal Revenue Service had targeted conservative groups, announced “I love the IRS,” four words that had never before been uttered in the course of human history.

Writer-director Nicholas Meyer, who prides himself on being a free speech advocate, declared that he was absolutely delighted that conservatives were now being blacklisted in Hollywood. I guess that would be Constitutional Amendment 1A, the one guaranteeing free speech for Nick Meyer.

Speaking of blacklists, when it was discovered that the director of the California Musical Theater, Scott Eckern, opposed same-sex marriage, Marc Shaiman, composer of “Hairspray,” and Jeffrey Seller, producer of “Avenue Q,” demanded he be fired. He was.

One can’t help reflecting that it was so much easier in the old days when you could recognize the bad guys by their black boots and Nazi armbands.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write

Author Bio:

Burt Prelutsky, a very nice person once you get to know him, has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated. For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile. Talk about being well-rounded, he plays tennis and poker... and rarely cheats at either. He lives in the San Fernando Valley, where he takes his marching orders from a wife named Yvonne and a dog named Angel.
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  • souvoter

    Moderate Republicans currently being sold a rotten bill of goods on immigration! I cannot believe they are falling for the democrat crap again. With all the democrat scandals going on, Republicans should not vote to give democrats more voters. Don’t they remember the IRS controlled the 2010 censes??!!!!! There are probably 50 million, not 11 million illegals!!!! For crying out loud!!!!!

  • Wheels55

    The proof of all of this is that liberals can name-call, villianize and be as nasty as they want, but conservatives are intollerant people.

    By the way, politicians who are also lawyers are worse than lawyers. Not for the obvious thought that both are annoying, but because these are the same people who vote on bills that they do not read.

  • msgmak

    To prove the point even further, you would think by now that our Dept of education could agree on a system for teacher evaluation, not so and never will. Instead our schools have the gonads to prosecute children for eating gun shaped pastry. These academics are called “Heroes”. Not in my book!

    • sjangers

      Objective standards tend to be anathema to the liberal elites. I can’t ever imagine the Department of Education agreeing on an effective system for evaluating teachers. It’s all about how something makes us ‘feel’, and the possibility of losing jobs for being poor teachers doesn’t feel very good to many liberals in education.

      Similarly, that little guy who got into so much trouble with his pastry gun didn’t make the educational staff in his school feel very safe. But consider what might have happened if it had been a little girl who had carefully nibbled his toaster strudel into the shape of a female body part. Sure, there might have been some conservative outcry in the community. But it’s easy to imagine the majority of the educational establishment feeling all warm and fuzzy about what she did, giving her a pass, and the liberal opinion-makers lauding her behavior, equating it to a form of performance art, and lionizing her for her bravery.

      That kind of double-standard would be a little harder to achieve with objective standards, which is another reason we’ll probably never see anything like that coming out of DoEd while the leftist elites hold any power within that establishment.

  • Royalsfan67

    Libs live by the old adage, “The enemy of my enemy is my friend”.
    They love Muslims because they hate Christians AKA conservatives and want to kill them all. They are too stupid to realize they are a target also.

    I believe Saul Alinsky and his pals back in the late 60s summed it up best in their Rules for Radicals, “Free speech for me but not for thee”

  • souvoter

    Seems to me, liberals hate conservatives more than terrorists, since they are so adamant about not closing the borders. Only makes it more obvious how extreme and unselective they are about their voters. The more hyprocritical; the better.