Hell On Earth

I have always felt that when politicians clamor for work projects, instead of focusing on roads and bridges, they should be mentioning prisons. We never seem to have enough of them. As a result, felons are constantly being released before finishing their sentences.

And whereas liberals are always insisting that civilized nations shouldn’t have so many people incarcerated, the truth, as usual, is they’re wrong. So long as those behind bars are there because they’ve committed actual felonies, and aren’t there because of their political or religious beliefs, there is no ideal number or percentage of people who should be locked up. If you’re in jail, it’s proof that you’re uncivilized, not that society is.

For my part, I believe that any judge who shows leniency to murderers, rapists and pedophiles, should be removed from the bench. I also believe that any defense attorney who succeeds in springing a defendant only to see the thug go out and repeat his crime should be indicted as an accessory. Furthermore, I think parole boards should disappear. The very notion of taking time off a sentence for so-called good behavior is a perversion of justice. Time off for not robbing a bank, stealing a car or raping a child, while behind bars? Time off for making his cot or eating all his peas? Instead, the system should simply add years for misbehavior.

Age limits are another absurd part of our legal system. But we’re not alone. In India, a gang of six raped and murdered a 23-year-old woman. The first defendant was recently tried and found guilty. He received the maximum sentence, but because he’s 17, the maximum sentence was three years in a juvenile facility. Three years for rape and murder?! What’s more, the chances are he would have received a similar sentence over here.

The fashion magazines like to say that 70 is the new 60 and 60 is the new 50, but it also works in reverse. Thanks to a society that encourages young girls to enter beauty contests when they’re five years old, promotes so-called sex education classes and the distribution of condoms to junior high students, and spends more time trying to disarm hunters than young thugs, 12 and 13 is the new 30.

Someone should come out with a book titled “Foreign Policy for Dummies,” and send a copy to Barack Obama. Starting with his mea culpa on behalf of the United States in Cairo four years ago, he hasn’t done a single thing that didn’t suggest we had a rank and stupid amateur as our head of state.

Whether it was leading from behind in Libya; insisting that Israel stop building apartment houses for their citizens and to pull back to pre-1967 borders in order to facilitate phony peace talks with Arab terrorists; announcing a surge in Afghanistan while at the same time announcing a date of withdrawal; breaking our promise to Poland and the Czech Republic to provide them with a missile defense system in order to placate Russia; or announcing that if al-Assad crossed the red line by using chemical weapons on Syrians, he would suffer dire consequences, and then repeating the same threat after he had crossed it a second time, Obama has shown himself to be incapable of performing on the world stage any more competently than he does here at home. Frankly, I am still looking for a job that isn’t above his pay grade.

On top of everything else, even when he was announcing a strike on Syria, he promised it would be swift and painless — sort of like when the dentist is about to give you a shot of Novocain — and shouldn’t be interpreted as an attempt to bring about regime change.

In the two weeks he spent futzing around before he finally decided he would leave it up to Congress to take the heat, Syria had successfully moved its weaponry out of harm’s way and allegedly moved political prisoners to airports and armories, using them as human shields. God forbid we should ever attack without warning!

What I don’t see Obama doing, although I suspect it would play fairly well with everyone except, perhaps, those last few subscribers to the NY Times, would be to resign from the U.N. How many more times do we have to go, hat in hand, to those creeps asking for a united action only to have Russia or China veto it? Heck, if we quit and stopped subsidizing the U.N., we’d not only save a few bucks, but we could stop pretending that the likes of Susan Rice and Samantha Power are qualified to do anything beyond overseeing a PTA bake sale.

Finally, I heard a prominent Protestant minister on the radio last week. When the host asked him why so few evangelical pastors seemed willing to speak out on social issues, such as same sex marriages, he said that most of them are afraid of being labeled right-wingers by those on the left.

Once I understood he was being serious, I had to laugh. Assuming he knows what he’s talking about, someone should explain to those demented souls that so far as run-of-the-mill Marxists are concerned, there’s only one thing worse than being a conservative, and that’s being an evangelical.

If they don’t even know that much, perhaps I’ve stumbled upon the reason that church attendance is plummeting.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Libya, Oh Libya

After you’ve read this article, Burt hopes you’ll also enjoy The Geek Chorus.

I was wondering how long it would take Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to take the blame for the murder of Ambassador Stevens and the other three Americans at the Libyan consulate. After the ensuing brouhaha promised to hurt Obama’s chances in November, her only choice was to throw herself under the bus or wait to be thrown.

Normally, in spite of the four murders by Islamic jihadists, the American media would have glossed over the event. The New York Times, whose motto used to be “All the News That’s Fit to Print” but is now “All the News That Doesn’t Embarrass Barack Obama,” pretty much ignored the events in Benghazi until U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice went on a bunch of Sunday news shows and pretended the attack had everything to do with a video that had an even tinier viewership than The Chris Matthews Show. As it has proven since 2008, the MSM not only doesn’t object to this administration lying to the American people, but is eager to aid and abet in the deception.

However, once Team Obama started lying to the members of the media, a line was crossed and it proved to be a deal breaker. You can imagine Obama’s shock. After all, when it came to sitting up, heeling and rolling over, these spayed and neutered lap dogs had all proven themselves to be far more obedient than Bo.

On the other hand, one can readily understand the media’s heartbreak. After all, the unspoken arrangement had always been that they’d do everything within their power to prop up Obama even if it meant acting a lot more like pimps and flacks than like reporters, and, in return, he would not embarrass them any more than they were willing to embarrass themselves.

As you probably noticed, the media was anxious to attack Romney and Ryan for “politicizing Libya,” as if somehow it was traitorous to ask why the State Department had answered Stevens’ pleas for greater protection at the consulate by diminishing what little security he had, leaving him essentially unguarded in one of the most dangerous places on earth just prior to the 11th anniversary of 9/11.

The idea that David Axelrod and other members of Obama’s re-election gang would accuse Romney or anyone else of politicizing the situation would be laughable, were it not for the mutilated corpses of those four dedicated Americans. Talk about pots calling kettles black, there hasn’t been a single moment during the past four years, aside from when he was goofing off on some golf course that Obama hasn’t been politicking.

For the sake of having life in Libya appear to be terrorist-free, Obama needed to have the Benghazi consulate appear to be as safe and secure as if it were located in Branson, Missouri. After all, he had just given a major campaign address in which he boasted about his foreign policy by stating that Osama bin Laden was dead and al-Qaeda was on life support.

But, suddenly, thanks to a series of barbaric attacks that stretched from Egypt to Indonesia, Joe Biden was having to change his favorite mantra from “Osama bin Laden is dead and GM is alive” to “Osama bin Laden is dead…and, hey, how about those Atlanta Falcons!”

Speaking of Biden, whoever thought that it was a good idea for him to spend 90 minutes at the Vice-Presidential debate, sneering, sniping and giggling like a school girl, because that would be all that was required to fire up the Democratic base must have even greater contempt for the Democratic base than I do.

Is it just me or does everyone get the feeling that perhaps when Joe Biden got his hair transplant, the plugs were inserted with such force that they caused permanent brain damage? As for all those facial contortions he engaged in at the debate, the only rationale I could come up with was that he figured if he just kept flashing that Joker-like smirk, the IRS would finally allow him to deduct the teeth-whitening procedure as a legitimate business expense.

The takeaway from all this is that there isn’t a dumber group of people in America than politicians. In spite of the preponderance of evidence to the contrary, they continue to believe that they can carry on tawdry affairs, accept bribes and cover up various sins and misdemeanors, and get away with it. In spite of guys like Gary Hart, Mark Sanford, Ted Kennedy and Bill Clinton, all caught with their pants down; in spite of any number of mayors, governors and congressmen, being discovered with their grubby mitts in the cookie jar; and in spite of Richard Nixon being driven from the Oval Office, not because of a minor kerfuffle, but because of a clumsy cover-up; politicians continue to believe they exist in a cocoon when it’s actually a glass house without curtains.

If Obama had simply fessed up to his self-serving mistake instead of pretending the Benghazi bloodbath was motivated by a video, which was what he told the U.N. General Assembly before jetting off to a fund-raiser in Las Vegas, the media would have been only too happy to cover his heinie, insisting, no doubt, that George Bush had done far worse things.

Moreover, if Obama had spent a tenth of the time he’s devoted to begging for campaign funds to working with Congress, “sequestration” would just be another hoity-toity word none of us had ever come across.

Finally, there is probably no truth to the rumor that between now and Election Day Joe Biden will feign a heart attack and be replaced on the ticket by Obama’s new best friend, Big Bird. On the other hand, Vegas bookmakers are offering 2-1 odds that Mr. Bird will be our next secretary of state, replacing Hillary Clinton, who will require months of recuperation after being accidentally run over eight or nine times by Obama’s bus.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

After you’ve read this article, Burt hopes you’ll also enjoy The Geek Chorus.

Obama In Denial, (But Not Yet the Nile)

In case you haven’t noticed, the White House approached YouTube about removing a trailer for the dorky film “Innocence of Muslims” from its site. The White House asked YouTube, which is owned by Google, to “review whether it violates their terms of service.”

Both YouTube and Google replied that it does not violate their terms of service. However, access to the trailer is being limited in Libya, Egypt and some other Muslim countries. The White House insists, against much evidence to the contrary, that the film touched off the deadly riots not only in Libya and Egypt, but also, as I write, some 19 other nations. YouTube pointed out that even if the trailer were removed from its site, it would make little difference, because it has become available on countless other Internet sites.

I took a peek at the trailer, as a service to you, my gentle readers, so that you wouldn’t have to sully yourselves. Just between us, I would rather have spent the time looking at topless photos of Kate Middleton that were recently published in a French (of course) magazine, but duty trumps decadence.

The trailer is off-the-wall ridiculous, about as bad as filmmaking ever gets – with the possible exception of Ed Wood’s 1959 masterpiece, “Plan 9 from Outer Space.”

To be honest, I couldn’t stomach the whole trailer, not even a significant portion of it, so you, gentle readers, will have to fend for yourselves after all. Meanwhile, I am scouring the foreign-magazine section of the public library.

In addition to muscling YouTube, the White House has launched an investigation of the alleged mastermind/genius behind “Innocence of Muslims,” a Coptic Christian and ex-white-collar criminal named Nakoula Basseley Nakoula. They are hoping that he may have violated his probation in making the film.

Somehow this seems unsporting. If making a lousy film can land you in jail, the Beverly Hills hoosegow would be jam full by now.

Come on, Obama, Hillary and the rest of you, let’s keep our eyes on the ball. This film isn’t the reason for the riots. Rioters who were interviewed by brave, intrepid reporters didn’t know bupkes about “Innocence of Muslims.”

“That’s a load of mishegass,” said one rioter. (OK, just kidding.)

The riots give every sign of being an Al-Qaeda hit, timed to the U.S. commemoration of 9/11. The rioters have raised black, Al-Qaeda-style banners to replace the American flags they have torn down and burned. They have shouted: “We are all Osamas, Obama!” This is not the sort of thing that film critics say.

Obama, Hillary and the rest of them just can’t admit that their touchy-feely Arab Spring/Muslim Outreach approach to world affairs has failed. They have bleeped up.

Let’s celebrate freedom of speech in America, but let’s also strong-arm Internet sites and throw the dumbass filmmaker back in the can (pun intended).

Take that trailer off the Internet and all the rioters will cheerfully disperse and return to their tents. Yeah, right!

You may not be seeing or hearing the following words in the future, especially if Barack is re-elected, so let me set them down for posterity:

“Oh say does that star-spangled banner yet wave, O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?”

If This Doesn’t Sink Obama, What Can?

If President Obama had Czechoslovakia to give away, would he give it to religious zealots in the Middle East? Don’t bet against it. The winner of the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize is the early-betting favorite to win this year’s annual Neville Chamberlain Memorial Appeasement Award.

It started with this statement, issued by Mr. Obama’s embassy in Egypt, in response to a movie, produced by a couple of Americans, that belittles the Prophet Muhammad:

“The Embassy of the United States in Cairo condemns the continuing efforts by misguided individuals to hurt the religious feelings of Muslims – as we condemn efforts to offend believers of all religions. Today, the 11th anniversary of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks on the United States, Americans are honoring our patriots and those who serve our nation as the fitting response to the enemies of democracy. Respect for religious beliefs is a cornerstone of American democracy. We firmly reject the actions by those who abuse the universal right of free speech to hurt the religious beliefs of others.”

Hundreds of the noble, brave Egyptian beneficiaries of the “Arab Spring” that Obama had hailed so hopefully last year then proceeded to scale the walls of the embassy that had issued that statement, tear down the American flag flying overhead, and rip it to pieces.
Whereupon the embassy proclaimed: “This morning’s condemnation still stands. As does our condemnation of unjustified breach of the embassy.”

Here’s another way they could have phrased that: “We believe in free speech, except when it offends our enemies, because this is a dangerous world. See what happened as a result of two shlubs exercising free speech? We deserved the retaliation, but we have to confess that we don’t like it. So, Americans, button your lips if you want to continue to live in a world where you can enjoy your liberties.”

Sound farfetched? You will have to argue long and hard to persuade me that essentially those very thoughts weren’t circulating through the so-called minds of the embassy spokesmen.

I am writing this as the news continues to unfold, so I can’t swear to everything in this essay.

The last I heard, there was speculation that the attack on our embassy in Egypt had nothing to do with any movie, that it was planned as part of an in-your-face counter-observance of 9/11. A sequence of anti-American demonstrations in other Middle Eastern countries today seems to lend validity to that theory.
Our very own embassy in Egypt, manned by perhaps the stupidest people in our Foreign Service, gave the helots a convenient hook on which to hang their barbarity. They didn’t have to come off looking like barbarians, but rather like devout defenders of their religion.

I don’t even want to think about the possibility that we could have avoided all this if the embassy had kept its own yap shut. Maybe there is a case to be made for not exercising free speech!

The worst incident, so far, occurred in Libya – the same Libya that Mr. Obama rescued from the tyrrany of Muammar Gaddafi and delivered over to democracy. At the U.S. consulate in Benghazi, the democratic hordes stormed, pillaged, burned and murdered. They shot to death three embassy staffers, and committed unspeakable acts upon U.S. Ambassador Christopher Stevens, whom they dragged through the streets and somehow “smothered,” to quote the official report.

Can you picture any enemy of the United States daring to do anything like this during the presidency of Ronald Reagan? And if it happened, how long do you suppose it would be before there was a cataclysmic response?

The events of the past two days in the Middle East were perhaps an inevitable result of our President’s limp-wristed foreign policy. He seems to believe, just as fervently as our enemies, that America is fundamentally evil and does not deserve any consideration from the rest of the world. That point of view is not unusual, but it seems somehow inappropriate for the principal protector and defender of our country.

“Make no mistake: We will work with the Libyan government to bring to justice the killers who attacked our people,” Obama said.

What an obvious thing to say, and how empty. Does he really expect the Libyan government to corral the hundreds of people who could justifiably be tried for first-degree murder, and stand them up before a firing squad – which appears to be the preferred method of capital punishment in that great democracy?

What we have seen in the past couple of days is a clear demonstration of the bankruptcy of the Obama foreign policy, the inevitable consequence of Obama’s negligence and inaction. What we have seen are two of the darkest days in the history of American diplomacy.

If Obama can get re-elected after this, then the situation is just hopeless. Our democratic system will be shown to be broken beyond repair.