Mariano Rivera For President

If you’re not a baseball fan, you might not know who Mariano — Mo to his friends, fans and teammates — Rivera is. He is the closer for the New York Yankees, the fellow they’ve been calling on since the mid-90s to protect leads in the late innings. Nobody has ever come close to being as good at what he does as Rivera. This past season, as he’s announced his retirement, every team the Yankees have played against has honored him. Even the Boston Red Sox gave him testimonials and gifts. Several teams have given him checks for his foundation. And every member of the opposing teams has stood and applauded the man and his accomplishments.

But Mo deserves it. In addition to displaying unmatched talent for 17 seasons, he has performed under the largest spotlight in baseball with grace and humility. When people ask how this native of Panama has been able to pitch the way he has even into his 40s, he credits God first and foremost, and then mentions his family, his teammates and the Yankee organization.

When I saw him recently on TV making his farewell appearance at Yankee Stadium, I found myself wishing we had someone of his caliber in the Oval Office. Can anyone even imagine a Republican having a good word to say about Obama, who ran as a great uniter, but has spent five years demeaning the loyal opposition, accusing them at various times of being racists, obstructionists and traitors?

What I don’t understand is how Obama gets away with arbitrarily postponing the Affordable Health Care mandate for business owners. Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi keep telling us ObamaCare is the law of the land, but Obama keeps ignoring the embarrassing parts of it. According to the Supreme Court, ObamaCare is legal because they decided it’s a tax, the very thing Obama spent two years denying it was. But if it’s a tax, where does Obama get off insisting that only some people have to pay it?

It may not have been noticed in some places, but Obama, Biden and Hillary Clinton, all stayed away from Margaret Thatcher’s funeral. However, Obama sent an official delegation numbering 14 when socialist dictator and all-around swine Hugo Chavez was laid to rest.

Although I rarely disagree with my friend Bernie Goldberg, he recently devoted an article to comparing the civil rights of gays to the religious rights of Christians. Bernie was entering the fray on behalf of gays, who had been denied wedding cakes and floral decorations by evangelical business owners who oppose same-sex marriages.

He pointed out that such marriages are now legal in several states, and that takes precedence in a nation of laws. I have a different take on things. One, I happen to think that if someone is willing to forego the profit, he should have the same right to withhold service as storeowners who refuse to deal with shirtless or shoeless customers.

In addition, there are always florists and bakers who would be only too happy to supply cakes and flowers, so it is hard for me to imagine that the homosexual couples wanted either as much as they wanted to create problems for those whose religious beliefs offended them.

Moreover, it doesn’t seem that long ago that I was reading about Muslim taxi drivers who were allowed to refuse rides to people carrying packages out of liquor stores and blind people if they were accompanied by their Seeing Eye dogs. It just seems to me that Christians shouldn’t have fewer religious rights in America than Muslims.

Recently, someone sent me a list of high-profile shootings. Starting in 1865, we had a Democrat named John Wilkes Booth killing Abe Lincoln. In 1881, a left-wing radical shot James Garfield. In 1963, a socialist shot John F. Kennedy. In 2010, a registered Democrat named Jared Loughner shot Rep. Gaby Giffords and killed six others. In 2013, a registered Democrat named Adam Lanza shot and killed his mother before killing 26 others at a local school.

The point being that guns don’t kill people; left-wingers kill people.

In closing I will quote H.L. Mencken, who wrote: “The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false face for the urge to rule it” and Mark Twain, who observed: “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

For my part, whenever I find myself in that unlikely position, I demand a recount.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write

A Cornucopia of Observations

When Margaret Thatcher, who came to power when England had an unemployment rate of about 13% and managed to reduce it to 5.8%, passed away, a large number of Brits celebrated the occasion by singing “Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead.” They despised her not only because she rescued her nation from sinking into the abyss of European socialism, but that she did it in part by facing down the powerful coalminer’s union. And, sadly, if you saw her movie bio, “The Iron Lady,” just about the only thing you would have known about this glorious leader is that she eventually became a dotty old woman hearing voices.

Here in America, millions of left-wing cretins greeted Ronald Reagan’s death in similar fashion. Like Thatcher, he inherited an economy from Jimmy Carter that was basically on life support and turned it around in just a few years. He was despised by those on the Left, at least in part, because he had faced down the air controller’s union.

The secret of their success was that they had principles and refused to be cowed by the elitists who inhabit academia and a media that has never gotten over its infantile infatuation with Soviet-style communism.

We may never see their like again.

Instead, we are cursed with the likes of the Obamas. While the progressives sing his praises, he does everything in his power to destroy the middle class, while the missus has the gall to whine to the CBS affiliate in Burlington, Vermont, “Believe me, I’m a busy single mother. I shouldn’t say ‘single,’ though. As a busy mother, sometimes, you know, when you’ve got a husband who’s president, it can feel a little single.”

I have tried to imagine how a woman who has more hand maidens than Marie Antoinette and is constantly flying off to vacation in exotic locales; has chefs, make-up artists and an army of nannies at her beck and call; and doesn’t even have to walk the family dog; can muster the chutzpah to complain how difficult she has it. But, then, her husband manages to make it sound like he’s being water-boarded any time he merely has to talk to a Republican.

Walt Whitman once observed “To have great poets, there must be great audiences.” It is something I have long said about movies and even TV shows. So long as people are satisfied with garbage, there’s little incentive for studios and networks to produce anything worthwhile. The same, I have come to realize, is true when it comes to politics. After all, when someone who has made a rotten economy worse and has badly misplayed his hand when it comes to foreign affairs, can be re-elected president, it figures that the RNC would busy itself trying to figure out how to out-bribe and out-promise the Democrats in order to seduce Hispanics, blacks, women and twenty-somethings, into switching parties.

Finally, you have probably heard that those killed and wounded by Major Nidal Hasan have been denied the honor and benefits that go with Purple Hearts because Obama’s Department of Defense has categorized the massacre as “workplace violence.”

It makes you wonder why those being wounded and killed in Afghanistan aren’t also being deprived of their medals. After all, if you’re in the military, what else would you call a war zone but a workplace?

The Defense Department further argues that if Hasan’s victims were awarded Purple Hearts, it might harm his chances of receiving a fair trial. I contend that after three-and-a-half years, nobody should utter the words “fair trial” and “Hasan” in the same sentence. There is nothing the least bit fair about this jihadist’s still being alive after killing and maiming more than four dozen Americans while shrieking “Allah Akbar!” at Fort Hood.

Speaking of which, Fort Hood, an Army base in Texas, was, thanks to the eunuchs at the Pentagon and lunkheads such as Sen. Dianne Feinstein, a gun-free zone. Gun-free, that is, except, of course, for the FN Five-seven the Muslim creep was firing until police officers Mark Todd and Kim Munley showed up and shot him.

No word yet whether Major Hasan is going to receive a Purple Heart.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write