“The Attack Of The Cuckoos” and “Ebola & Other Epidemics”

How it is that so many cuckoos escaped from their clocks and have wound up in positions of authority, I will never know. But there’s no getting around the fact that the American symbol is no longer a bald eagle or even Ben Franklin’s preferred turkey, but has been replaced by the Swiss-made cuckoo bird.

For instance, the University of California, San Francisco, has just launched an online abortion course that will delve into “clinical aspects of medication abortion, aspiration abortion, post-abortion contraception, and pain management for abortion.” According to Prof. Jody Steinauer: “I think if we can inspire even a small portion of the people who take the course to take steps in their communities to increase access to safe abortion and decrease stigma about abortion, then we will have been totally successful.”

So far, 3,000 people have signed up for the course. I’m sure that ghouls everywhere are taking heart from the fact that abortion continues to be a growth industry. As for me, I think America is suffering from a dangerous lack of stigma.

As you may have heard, Nidal Hasan, who killed or maimed over 40 innocent people at Fort Hood, has written a letter to Pope Francis, complaining that Barack Obama keeps claiming that his butchery was workplace violence. Apparently he wants Francis to intercede on his behalf and point out to Obama that he is one of Allah’s proud soldiers and not just another creep who went postal because he got fired or didn’t get a raise. I can see his point. I mean, imagine how Hitler would have felt if his invasion of Poland had been dismissed as trespassing.

I do get a chuckle when young poorly educated malcontents who are often subsidized by wealthy old hypocritical reprobates like George Soros periodically take to the streets and demonstrate against Wall Street or the International Monetary Fund, blindly obeying the marching orders of wealthy old hypocritical reprobates like George Soros.

In addition to hosting an Obama fund-raiser at her home, Gwyneth Paltrow also introduced the guest of honor by batting her eyes and gushing: “You’re so handsome, I can’t speak properly.” If she considers Mr. Bat Ears so good-looking it makes her tongue-tied, one has to wonder how she ever managed to deliver a single line of dialogue when she worked with Hollywood heartthrobs Daniel Craig, Viggo Mortensen, Michael Douglas, Jude Law and Robert Downey, Jr. Perhaps the 42-year-old Valley Girl had all her dialogue dubbed by a grown-up.

Obama, who also tends to swoon in his own presence, managed to say, “I’m taking her to my next event.”

I’d love to have been a fly on the wall when Obama got home. Recalling how angry Michelle got when Obama took a selfie of himself with the leggy blonde Prime Minister of Denmark, Helle Thorning-Schmidt, at Nelson Mandela’s memorial, I couldn’t help picturing Barack trying to sneak into the White House only to find Michelle in the hallway holding a rolling pin and giving him the fish eye, just the way Maggie used to greet Jiggs in the Sunday funny papers.

The Army, which has become just as corrupt as the IRS, the Secret Service and the FBI, under the current administration has announced that it won’t go public about its investigation into Bowe Bergdahl’s desertion. At this point, don’t be too surprised if Bergdahl winds up receiving the Medal of Honor for merely pretending to be a traitor so he could go undercover and spy on the Taliban.

When the late Thomas Duncan first visited the Dallas hospital, he had a 103 degree fever and he admitted he’d just been to Liberia, but he was sent home with nothing more than a few pain killers. Once he died of Ebola, it figures there would be those who claimed that racism was the reason he was treated in such cavalier fashion. Nonsense! So far as I can tell, it was simply ObamaCare in action.

Although I dislike being at odds with my readers, I must confess I was shocked by the results of my latest poll. When I asked if people thought the Republicans would take control of the Senate and, if they did, if it would make a difference, I was obviously asking people to make an educated guess or, rather, two educated guesses. That meant that “maybe” or “perhaps” was a given, but it wasn’t a suitable response to either question. Fortunately, I managed to get 211 people to play by the rules.

It seems that 159 people thought the GOP would gain control, while 52 thought Harry Reid would manage to retain his stranglehold. However, only 61 people thought it would make a difference, 150 were just as sure it wouldn’t.

Frankly, I don’t know how those 150 could be so misguided. It’s true that a Republican Senate and Republican House wouldn’t be able to stop Obama entirely in his tracks. He’d still have his phone and his pen, but at least House bills would finally be voted on in the Senate, and Obama would be forced to veto them, showing everyone once and for all who the real obstructionist is. In addition, it is no small thing that Obama wouldn’t be able to appoint judges to the federal bench or place any more Kagans and Sotomayors on the Supreme Court, which is the legacy whereby ex-presidents are able to continue poisoning the atmosphere for decades long after they’ve left the scene of the crime.

Finally, by now I suspect everyone knows that 10 Secret Service agents lost their jobs for consorting, as they say, with Colombian prostitutes while a White House insider who happened to be the son of a major Obama donor wound up with a promotion to the State Department after he consorted with his own Colombian prostitute that very same evening.

In other news, Bill Clinton has announced that he’s heading down to Colombia on a fact-finding mission.


Ebola & Other Epidemics

I hope that the Republicans gain control of the Senate, but I don’t expect any miracles. I just want to wrench the reins away from Harry Reid, and force Obama to veto all those bills that the House has been sending along since 2010 that Reid has killed, thus sparing the Senate Democrats from ever having to cast an embarrassing vote. After all these years, the public would finally have a chance to see a real obstructionist in action.

Some of my readers have likened Obama to the serpent in the Garden of Eden, but that’s hardly fair. For one thing, the snake didn’t keep running off to play golf and attend fund-raisers. For another thing, the snake didn’t require the services of a Teleprompter in order to utter a coherent sentence. And for yet another, the snake only lied once.

I keep wondering why Sarah Palin keeps sticking her shnoz into every election in the nation — sometimes to the detriment of the Republican Party — but shied away from running for the Senate, leaving it up to a relative unknown, Dan Sullivan, to oppose Alaskan incumbent Mark Bigich (D).

Another question that keeps popping up in my head is why we don’t enlist Israel to help us defeat ISIS. The Arab and Muslim nations wouldn’t approve? So what else is new? At least we can trust the Israelis, which is far more than we can say about our alleged allies in Iraq, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, the United Arab Emirate or Turkey. And once we mop up the beheaders, we should team up and take out Iran’s centrifuges.

Speaking of our only real ally in the Middle East, it seems that an Israeli cargo ship, the Zim Shanghai, was prevented from unloading in Oakland, thanks to pro-Islamic demonstrators. Members of the International Longshore and Warehouse Union claimed they were physically threatened and feared for their lives.

Did I forget to mention that there were eight demonstrators? Apparently longshoremen aren’t quite as tough as they used to be, or perhaps, like the majority of pinheads in the Bay area, they’re just more anti-Semitic than they used to be.

Israel has managed in a little over 60 years to become one of the most indispensable nations on the face of the earth, and not just because of their medical and scientific innovations. For the various despots in the Middle East, Israel serves as a very handy scapegoat. For the likes of college professors, show business celebrities and, apparently, California’s longshoremen, it allows them to be as anti-Semitic as Hitler and Stalin, without having to admit to anything worse than being opposed to Israel’s policies.

It is nearly impossible for civilians to compete with politicians when it comes to telling lies, but feminists Betty Friedan and Gloria Steinem came close with their relentless propaganda telling women that they could have it all. Nobody has it all. Aspirations are important, even essential, but these chowderheads spent decades not only telling impressionable young women that, no matter what their own limitations were, everything was possible, and if they didn’t wind up achieving all of their wackier fantasies, they’d been cheated. And by whom, you ask? Well, by the entire male gender, of course.

Women have even been convinced that they are paid 70 cents on the dollar for doing the exact same job as a man, even though that requires believing that every employer is engaged in a huge conspiracy to pay men 43% more than women, the bottom line be damned!

Other big lies involve the minimum wage and corporate taxes. The way the liberals tell it, if employers are forced to pay unskilled workers far more than they’re worth and if corporations are forced to pay higher taxes in order to finance an ever-expanding, increasingly corrupt, state or federal government, it serves them right. What the liberals never mention to their sheep-like followers is that any such increases are immediately passed on to the rest of us in added costs for goods and services. As Sherlock Holmes was wont to say, it’s elementary.

Unfortunately, millions of our fellow citizens never learned anything about basic economics in school. The only things drilled into their empty little noggins was that nicotine, capitalism and conservatives were bad; the Constitution was inconsequential because it was the work of old white men; and that those like Obama, Castro, Guevara, Chavez, Allende and Mao, were the sort of leaders America needs, but too rarely gets.

That’s not to say we don’t have more than our share of nincompoops in positions of authority. Take Dallas Judge Clay Jenkins. He got himself a trove of publicity by accompanying Thomas Duncan’s relatives out of their Ebola-contaminated apartment in his civilian duds, all part of the carefully programmed narrative being spoon fed to us that Ebola can’t be transmitted through the air.

I assume that Judge Jenkins measured the risk and decided that it would be worth a ton of votes in future elections. After all, if the disease can only be passed along through direct contact and bodily fluids, why is everybody whose job calls for being in the vicinity of Ebola victims, but doesn’t require conning voters, walking around looking like an astronaut?

Finally, a few readers have taken me to task for referring to Bob Packwood in a recent piece dealing with sexual predators as a Democrat when, in fact, he was a Republican. The short answer is that I forgot that for political reasons, the very liberal Packwood pretended to be a Republican. The longer answer is that just because some people lie about their political affiliation is no reason the rest of us should encourage that sort of thing.

For instance, in the Senate, both Angus King and Bernie Sanders call themselves Independents, even though they caucus and vote with the Democrats, and take their marching orders from Harry Reid.

Worse yet, we have Charlie Crist, he of the white hair and the used car salesman’s smirk, running for governor in Florida. In a matter of just eight short years, the former ambulance chasing buzzard has run and lost as a Republican and as an Independent, and now that he’s running against Rick Scott, he’s calling himself a Democrat. He even lies about his own name, which happens to be Joseph.

When it comes to camouflage, chameleons could take lessons from this phony.

Finally, I’m betting that if Crist loses this time, in 2016, he’ll be running as a Whig.

CALIFORNIA READERS: At the Wednesday, October 15th, 11:30 meeting of Reseda-Tarzana Republican Women Federated, I will be giving a talk, followed by a Q&A session, starting at 1:30. Address: Braemar Country Club, 4001 Reseda Blvd.

Burt’s Webcast is every Wednesday at Noon Pacific Time.
Tune in at K4HD.com His Call-in Number is: (818) 570-5443

©2014 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.




“Liars & The Lies They Tell” and “Consequential Kvetching”

If politicians and bureaucrats ever stopped lying for even five minutes, the ensuing silence would make the rest of us think we’d gone deaf.

For instance, we’re being told repeatedly that we have nothing to fear from the fellow down in Dallas who, instead of bringing back a souvenir t-shirt reading “I’ve Been to Liberia, Don’t Ask Me Why,” brought home a case of Ebola.

We’re being told by medical professionals, who just happen to be paid by the federal government, that the disease is terribly difficult to transmit. I’d almost be willing to believe them if every time I see one of these victims being transported to a hospital, he or she wasn’t being accompanied by people decked out from head to toe in hazmat suits.

Perhaps I’m simply being too doggone cynical, a trait I seem to have been born with, a trait I keep trying to overcome, but the politicians and bureaucrats simply won’t let me. For instance, just in the past few years, they lied about funneling weapons to Mexican gangsters and they lied about ObamaCare; they refer to Islamic terrorism as workplace violence, lied about the IRS not targeting conservatives and they let our veterans die while waiting for medical attention.

The bastards even lied to the Ebola victim, sending him home from the hospital the first time he showed up, essentially telling him he had a bad cold even after he came clean about where he’d just come from. On the other hand, he’d lied to the Liberians about having had no contact with Ebola victims just so he could get an exit visa. Makes a person wonder if once he’s cured, assuming he’s one of the lucky ones, Thomas Duncan plans to run for public office.

Even Obama’s former Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta blames the President for what’s happening in Iraq. Unfortunately, like every other schmuck in Washington, he waited three long years to write a book, expressing his dire warnings.

It’s simply not in the DNA of political appointees to ever quit over a matter of principle. We are told, belatedly, that even Secretary of State Hillary Clinton urged Obama to maintain a force of at least 10,000, but preferably 24,000, soldiers in Iraq to avoid the likes of ISIL filling the inevitable vacuum.

But, clearly, it is too much to expect public servants to forego the limos, the free junkets to exotic locales, the five-star hotels and the kowtowing entourages, over such a minor issue as national security.

It’s as if a lack of principles has become a prerequisite for those employed in Washington, D.C. We are constantly seeing the same lack of character and patriotism every time some bureaucratic nonentity claims to take total responsibility for an act of incompetence or criminality, but doesn’t resign or, unfortunately, ever face an indictment and a prison term.

One of the ironies of life is that the Democrats have assumed as one of their favorite themes the Republican War on Women. Talk about chutzpah! This is the party of Jack, Bobby and Ted Kennedy, Lyndon Johnson, Bob Packwood and Bill Clinton. Each of them was married and an Olympic-class sexual predator. One of them was a rapist and one of them left his paramour to drown in his car while he ran home and got his family’s legion of suck-ups to provide him with an alibi.

Just about the only woman who has come through an association with the higher-ups in the liberal camp virtually unscathed was Julia, the fictional character the Democrats came up with to illustrate how benevolent their policies are when it comes to females. Of course, Julia was shown to be entirely dependent on a man, Uncle Sam, to clothe, feed and house her, even though the likes of Hillary Clinton, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, Nancy Pelosi and Elizabeth Warren, are constantly telling young women how independent and powerful they are in this post Roe v. Wade America.

But a great many single women are so stupid that they can’t even see the obvious contradiction between being sold Julia on the one hand and flattery carrying the aroma of manure on the other hand.

When I say that single women, who vote overwhelmingly for the Democrats, are stupid, I’m not out to insult them, I’m merely stating a fact.

For instance, they’re so dumb that they actually think abortion on demand is a boon for them. Actually, Roe v. Wade has been one giant Get Out of Jail Free card for irresponsible males. It ensures that they can have unprotected sex with 10 different women in the same day, knowing they won’t be stuck having to provide even one cent in child support. Is it any wonder that Bill Clinton has been such an ardent supporter of the 1973 Supreme Court decision?

Finally, it is time for yet another Prelutsky poll. This time, there are just two questions: Will the GOP reclaim control of the Senate in the midterm elections? If they do, will it make any real difference?

Please send your votes to me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com without any commentary, just a simple Yes or No if you’d be so kind.


Consequential Kvetching

We all have things to complain about. We always have and we always will. But it strikes me that the things we have to gripe about have become increasingly important over the past 30 years or so because so often they leave America and the world in worse shape than before.

Our education system, once the envy of the world, has become hostage to progressive teachers, professors, administrators, fascistic student bodies and Islamic pressure groups.

Our mass media, which at one time, at least made the attempt to deal objectively with the news has, in the wake of Woodward and Bernstein’s enormous success, tossed off even the pretense of being anything other than a propaganda outlet for a liberal agenda.

Our politicians, who used to at least try to appear bi-partisan on issues important to the well-being of America, made it possible for voters who claimed they voted for the man, not the party, to sound principled and not merely self-deluded.

I was once married to a woman who, as a child, had come up with what I regarded as so diabolical a plan, she could have easily have taken top prize in a Machiavellian competition, if there had been such a thing. When she was about seven or eight, she took it upon herself to teach her brother, who was three or four at the time, the colors. But she intentionally taught them wrong, so he thought orange was blue and yellow was black and green was red. When I asked her why she had done it, she couldn’t recall. I guess when you’re seven or eight, you do evil things for no other reason than that it’s fun.

That’s the case, unless you’re a liberal at any age. Then you can pretend that global warming is settled science when, in reality, it’s merely a way for some people, people like Al Gore, to get rich and for other people, people such as Obama, Reid, Pelosi and Schumer, to gain even more control over the economy and the electorate, as they did with the satanic Affordable Care Act.

I used to question the mere existence of NATO. Knowing the European nations for the contemptible, leftist cowards they are, I couldn’t imagine why we continued to be a member. Once the organization threw the doors open to Turkey, an Islamic fox in the chicken coop, I knew that whatever past excuse there may have been for our membership, it no longer existed. Perhaps others were surprised by Turkey’s refusal to allow us to have airbases within its borders for the purpose of attacking the Islamic State, but not I. The fact is that Muslims, as we’ve seen time and again, haven’t the slightest objection to killing other Muslims, but they really hate it when non-Muslims, otherwise known as infidels, get in on the fun.

People who aren’t thinking straight complain that we’re stuck with a do-nothing Congress. It strikes me as the ideal situation. I mean, why would anyone want these people passing more laws and creating more regulations? If a toddler marks up your walls with crayons, would any sane person deal with the situation by providing him with an open can of paint? If it were up to me, Congress would meet for one month a year, and I would cut their salaries, pensions and staffs, by an equivalent 87.5 %.

Every once in a while, the difference between having talent and possessing wisdom, decency or even commonsense, is as obvious as an elephant in your kitchen. I happen to think that England’s Emma Thompson is not only a great actress, but a wonderful screenwriter, but that doesn’t prevent her from being an anti-Semitic apologist for the Arabs and Muslims trying to exterminate Israel.

I also happen to think that Carl Reiner is a gifted actor, writer and director, and a nice guy so long as you’re not discussing politics. I’ve been a fan for about 65 years, ever since he was a regular on the Sid Caesar Show. But a few years ago, he told me that he had two photos on the wall behind his desk. One was of FDR; the other was of Barack Obama.

He also told me that next to the Gettysburg Address, he thought that Obama’s speech about there being neither a blue America nor a red America, but only a purple America, was the greatest speech in human history.

Now even if Obama hadn’t proven himself to be most divisive president ever, outdoing even Lincoln, who only divided America geographically, it is outrageous for an educated person to accord Obama’s speech such homage.

Would anyone seriously claim that it was greater than Christ’s Sermon on the Mount? Greater than FDR’s first inaugural, in which he assured Americans midst the Depression that they had nothing to fear but fear itself? Greater than Lou Gehrig’s farewell to baseball in which the doomed 36-year-old claimed to be the luckiest man on the face of the earth? Greater than Patrick Henry’s inspiring address in 1775, in which he rallied his countrymen to the Revolution by declaring, “I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me Liberty or give me Death”? Greater than Indian Chief Joseph’s concluding his speech surrendering the Nez Perce tribe to the U.S. Army with the eloquent “From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more”?

How about Reagan’s address to the nation after the Challenger’s explosion, honoring the seven Astronauts for their courage as “they slipped the surly bounds of earth” in order to “touch the face of God”? Or any of Churchill’s morale-boosting speeches to the British people during the darkest days of World War II, but especially his 1940 address to the House of Commons, in which, employing the rumbling voice of God, which he often borrowed for such occasions, he said, “Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves that if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will say, ‘This was their finest hour.’”

In conclusion, it is worth noting that in 1850, California became the 31st state in the Union. Way back then, the people had no electricity. The state had no money. There were gun fights in the streets. Much of the land was desert, inhospitable to humans or agriculture. And most people spoke Spanish.

In other words, nothing much has changed in 164 years, except that it’s gotten a lot harder to find a parking space.

Burt’s Webcast is every Wednesday at Noon Pacific Time.
Tune in at K4HD.com His Call-in Number is: (818) 570-5443

©2014 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.