The Spectacle

Walking across the lobby of the Renaissance Hotel in Indian Wells, California, I was startled to see CNN on a very large TV in the lobby.  Thank God the sound was down but the chyron on the screen silently screamed out: “Impeachment hearings, White House in crisis.”

Crisis?  Geez.  Of course, no one working in the White House has spoken about a “crisis,” least of all the guy who runs the place – Donald Trump.  Despite the anti-Trump press ginning up the impeachment follies, there does not seem to be much concern in the Executive Branch.

Now, that could change if information emerges that Tiffany Trump was paid $100,000 a month for serving on the board of the Ukrainian poultry commission.  That might become a problem, even though Tiffany is said to like chicken salad sandwiches and therefore might be of help to the commission.

But lacking that kind of exposition, the impeachment evidence seems a bit scant.  A guy wearing a bow tie says some State Department lifers were worried about something, I’m not exactly sure what.  An American bureaucrat stationed in Kiev testified that he didn’t much like Trump’s policy in Ukraine.  And an Ambassador that the President fired doesn’t like him and he doesn’t like her.  Or so it seems.

Somewhere impeached President Andrew Johnson uttered: “really?”

That quote came from an anonymous source familiar with the afterlife.

It was not easy watching the impeachment hearings, that I can tell you.  It got so boring that, for the first time in my life, I was hoping the network would cut away from the political bloviating and put Dr. Phil back on.

I can’t say the same thing about Behar.  I’d rather watch the bow tie guy than her.

If this continues, the nets will have to start livening things up, or they’ll have no audience.  Perhaps flash a picture of Monica Lewinsky once in a while or Richard Nixon waving in front of the chopper.  Anything, to stimulate the proceedings.

In the end, President Trump will keep on keepin’ on, as the Grateful Dead once sang.  At least I think it was the Dead. But maybe it was Wolf Blitzer.  I’m not sure.

Anyway, the Republican Senators say they are not even watching the Impeachment Show, preferring old Roseanne reruns.  Those were the good old days.

The only winner here is Congressman Adam Schiff who finally found some shirts that fit around his neck.  Schiff may not bring the President down but he has become semi-famous and is likely to get a book deal.

The working title is:  “Are You Schiffing Me?”

Thank you and goodnight.